Love for a sister
by Jane-Elle
Summary: This is from Ron's POV. It's PG-13 because of little graphic detail, mentionings of incest and a bit m/m. Enjoy!


I sit here, staring at you

Disclaimer: I own nothing described in the story, too bad! 

Love for a sister

I sit here, staring at you. You're only the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. So strong in these times of darkness, and yet there you are. Lying in your bed, dreaming sweet dreams I don't play a role in anymore. 

Your adoration of me has changed. You no longer adore me, instead, you kiss the ground on which my best friend walks. 

I don't hate him for that, for I know that she can never have him. She wouldn't be happy with him, I know it. I am the only one she could talk to when it was dark and stormy outside. I was the only one to comfort her when our parents weren't at home and lightning struck the trees near our house. She still loves me, more like a brother than ever before. And I love her like a sister.

Your red hair lays spread out on your pillow, long and wavy. I touch it, it's soft and silky like angel's hair. I wish I had hair like that. It's sacred ground. I hate to admit to myself that one day another hand than mine's going to touch that beauty. But for the time being, it's mine, all mine. I run my hand down your cheek. It's so smooth, no irregularities in sight. Nothing that shows you're a 14-year-old and in the midst of puberty. You're still as beautiful as you've always been and always will be.

Something has changed her, that faithful night in the Chamber of Secrets. She seems so more grown up. It feels like she doesn't know which side she should choose. In the Chamber something happened, something that made her realize that life isn't all about love, but about hatred, rivalry and  power too. And that realization made her cherish love even more. 

I want to look in that pretty little head of yours. Look what's inside, see what you're thinking of. But you're closing up, I can feel it. Soon, I won't be able to sit here on the edge of your bed anymore, on a starry night with the full moon shining high above us in the sky. Because your room will be locked, like your heart and soul, and will only be opened for the right person. And that person is now Harry Potter. My best friend. My rival and therefore my enemy. After him, there will be so many others. Many others who'll break your heart. But who will steal your biggest treasure, your virginity? I can't stand the thought of another hand touching your fragile body. 

I hope it'll be nice, your first time. Mine was a disaster. I happened very quick, too quick for me to understand what happened. She only used my childish admiration for her own purposes and pleasure, and left me. She left me to heal my open wounds, and then came back to rip them open again and make them even deeper. I'm going to remember her name, and she'll be on top of my hit list. Fleur Delacour. Her death will be even more painful then the Cruciatus Curse. It wasn't smart of Moody to teach us those. Now that I know the Unforgivable Curses, I'll use them for my own advantages and hunt those I hate. And they'll suffer greatly.

My ideals will be known to the whole world. No one can stop me from killing everyone who hates me. That'll be a lot. Voldemort started it all. It's a good thing I'm not afraid to say his name any more. Not after I made the biggest decision in my life. I entered his ranks, yet I haven't got the Dark Mark yet. And I won't accept it either. I will delay it as long as possible and then I will make sure he'll be gone and never come back. After that, I'll have my own Dark Mark, and it will be feared more then Voldemort's. The whole wizarding world will be afraid to speak my name, just like with him. 

Sometimes I fear I'm going crazy. But I know I won't as long as you'll live, dear Ginny of mine. You are my soul-keeper, protector and holder of my soul. You're the one I show my true emotions to. I let you share my hopes and my dreams, my fears and the things I am proud of. Harry always gets all of the attention. Soon I will have that too. I'm lying dormant, waiting for a good time to come out and rule the world. And then all my enemies will turn into cowering, low-life scum, and I will kill them all. My reign of terror will begin, and it'll be awful.

My love for you is as pure as your heart was when you were born, although now it has been corrupted with what he's done to you. He made you fall in love with you the first time you saw him. I can see in his eyes that he finds it amusing that my little sister is so head over heels in love with him. 

His emerald green eyes, in which I can read the truth, shine ever so bright. He knows what I want to do, yet he doesn't do anything about it. He accepts my faults along with the things I excel in. My love and friendship for him are greater then anything in the world. Even the universe wouldn't be big enough to house my love for him. He doesn't love me back, and I can see that he pities me for having such a big heart. I love so many people with all my heart. That's my problem. I even love my enemies, I love them for the things they have, and I hate them for the qualities they have and I don't. Ruthlessness. Being able to really hate with all your might. 

Harry. I want you, I need you, I can't live without you. I can't live with you. You're so stubborn, so proud of yourself, and you're always willing to help someone who needs it. You're so honest, sweet and caring. I look at your soft, lush lips and I wish I could be the one kissing them instead of Hermione. It breaks my heart every time I see her plundering your lips and yet I keep loving both of you. My feelings towards Hermione are the same as the feelings I have towards you, Harry.

Will she be able to understand these feelings? Will she have them too, or is it just me who feels this? I can shove them away, saying they're something that goes with puberty. But they won't. They'll change into the love for a soul brother. And Hermione will always be out of my reach. But you, Ginny, will always be ready for me. Always cherish my love for you and hold it in the palm of your hand. You'll guard that piece of my soul I gave to you and never let it go. 

It's the love of a sister for a brother. Mine goes far beyond that. You'll never know that in nights like this I long to be your eternal lover, to make love to you and hear you moan my name in delight. That never can be. It'll be only looks, but never touching, never experiencing what I can give you. That's my curse, my curse for loving the most beautiful thing God ever created and therefore I unpurified it. 

I lay silently next to you. My last night close to you. Your skin is soft and warm. Slowly you turn around, sliding your leg down mine. I shiver, you snuggle up to my chest.

"You're cold, Ron," she says, with a dreamy voice.

"Yes, I guess I am."

"Promise me you'll never ever leave me. Love me beyond death, please?" she says, looking closely into my eyes. I feel my heart of stone melt into a golden one. Once again she made a miracle happen. No one can stay cold-hearted with her around.

"I will, Ginny. I'll always love you. But only as a brother," I say carefully.

"I'd never expect anything more," and once again she snuggles up against me. Like I am the thing that keeps her alive.

Don't worry about anything on this world, Ginny. I'm here and I will protect you. I'd die for you, I'd go to hell and back if you'd want me too. As long as you love me. I need you. 

A/N: well, that was something different. I've never written anything slash-like before. If you're seriously disturbed by the slight mention of incest in this story, don't bother to tell me because I don't care! I'd love it if you review it. My ego needs some serious boosts!


End file.
